Parshat Toldot

When we look at traditional jewish sources, including the statements of the rabbis,
we see the high importance and value placed on truth. Not only does the Torah command, ‘Stay far away from falsehood’ (Exodus 23:7), but also, emet is one of the names of god
Emet is also the word written on the forhead of the golem to bring it to life.

Given all of this emphasis on truth, the following passage from this week's Torah portion therefore, seems quite unusual:

(Genesis)

Chapter 27
¹ When Isaac was old and his eyes were too dim to see, he called his older son Esau and said to him, "My son." He answered, "Here I am." ² And he said, "I am old now, and I do not know how soon I may die. ³ Take your gear, your quiver and bow, and go out into the open and hunt me some game. ⁴ Then prepare a dish for me such as I like, and bring it to me to eat, so that I may give you my innermost blessing before I die."

⁵ Rebekah had been listening as Isaac spoke to his son Esau. When Esau had gone out into the open to hunt game to bring home, ⁶ Rebekah said to her son Jacob, "I overheard your father speaking to your brother Esau, saying, ⁷ 'Bring me some game and prepare a dish for me to eat, that I may bless you, with the Lord's approval, before I die.' ⁸ Now, my son, listen carefully as I instruct you. ⁹ Go to the flock and fetch me two choice kids, and I will make of them a dish for your father, such as he likes. ¹⁰ Then take it to your father to eat, in order that he may bless you before he dies." ¹¹ Jacob answered his mother Rebekah, "But my brother Esau is a hairy man and I am smooth-skinned. ¹² If my father touches me, I shall appear to him as a trickster and bring upon myself a curse, not a blessing." ¹³ But his mother said to him, "Your curse, my son, be upon me! Just do as I say and go fetch them for me."

¹⁴ He got them and brought them to his mother, and his mother prepared a dish such as his father liked. ¹⁵ Rebekah then took the best clothes of her older son Esau, which were there in the house, and had her younger son Jacob put them on; ¹⁶ and she covered his hands and the hairless part of his neck with the skins of the kids. ¹⁷ Then she put in the hands of her son Jacob the dish and the bread that she had prepared.

¹⁸ He went to his father and said, "Father." And he said, "Yes, which of my sons are you?" ¹⁹ Jacob said to his father, "I am Esau, your first-born; I have done as you told me. Pray sit up and eat of my game, that you may give me your innermost blessing." ²⁰ Isaac said to his son, "How did you succeed so quickly, my son?" And he said, "Because the Lord your God granted me good fortune." ²¹ Isaac said to Jacob, "Come closer that I may feel you, my son-whether you are really my son Esau or not." ²² So Jacob drew close to his father Isaac, who felt him and wondered. "The voice is the voice of Jacob, yet the hands are the hands of Esau." ²³ He did not recognize him, because his hands were hairy like those of his brother Esau; and so he blessed him.

²⁴ He asked, "Are you really my son Esau?" And when he said, "I am," ²⁵ he said, "Serve me and let me eat of my son's game that I may give you my innermost blessing." So he served him and he ate, and he brought him wine and he drank. ²⁶ Then his father Isaac said to him, "Come close and kiss me, my son"; ²⁷ and he went up and kissed him. And he smelled his clothes and he blessed him, saying, "Ah, the smell of my son is like the smell of the fields that the Lord has blessed.

In this passage, Jacob and his mother Rebecca enagage in a concerted effort to lie to his father and take his brother's blessing. This passage seems to show that Jacob, later renamed Israel, who is arguably the forefather in the Torah most important to the development of the Jewish people, was a liar. Not only that, he is a sort of con-artist or thief, stealing his brother's birth right through nefarious means. What do we make of this?

First of all, this brings us to an important question

is it ever okay to lie?

according to several jewish sources, it is

The Talmud records an usual debate between the houses of Hillel and Shammai concerning the words celebrants should sing when dancing in front of a newly married woman [as part of the wedding festivities]. According to the House of Hillel, the dancers should chant the same words in front of all brides: “What a beautiful and graceful bride!” Their opponents, the House of Shammai, disagree. “If she is lame or blind, are you going to say of her, ‘What a beautiful and graceful bride?’ Does not the Torah command, ‘Stay far away from falsehood’ (Exodus 23:7)?” They thus oppose reciting a standard formula; rather, each bride should be described “as she is” (see Babylonian Talmud, Ketubot 17a).

Hillel’s position is accepted as Jewish law. One praises the beauty of all brides and, in any case, the bride is likely to appear beautiful in the eyes of her groom.

When it comes to trying to reconcile feuding parties, Jewish law is remarkably tolerant of “white lies.” Of Aaron, Moses’ brother and Israel’s first high priest, the Rabbis [of ancient Judaism] relate that he would utilize untruthful means to make peace between people who had fought. He would go to one, telling him how sad his adversary was about the dispute, and how ashamed and disheartened he felt. Then he would go to the other and tell him the same thing. As the Midrash concluded, “Later, when the two met, they would embrace and kiss each other” (Avot de-Rabbi Natan 12:3).

The fact that Jewish tradition endorses Aaron’s behavior means that in instances of personal feuding, when truth and peace conflict, peace usually should take precedence.

Before you tell a truth that can cause only pain and inflict gratuitous hurt, ask yourself why you should tell it. There are indeed times when a pretty lie is preferable to an ugly truth.

So there are actually cases within judaism where lying is permitted, and perhaps even preferable.

In order to help others, end personal feuding, and create peace, lying is permitted.

But it does not seem like the case of Jacob is such a case.

So why, then, does our tradition recount such a detestable episode from the father of the Israelite nation?

Wouldn't it be better if such an incident was swept under the rug?

Many people (including the rabbis of the Midrash) do this. They paint Ishmael as a boorish violent person, and Jacob as an innocent young student.

Ishmael is the founder of the great empire of Rome, while Jacob is the founder of the small country of Israel.

But when we read the story of the Torah literally without any re-interpretation, it would seem here that Jacob is completely in the wrong.

So the question remains-- why?

There is one main reason that I can think of-- you can think of your own:

The Torah, the foundational Jewish text, is less interested in white washing its protagonists, and more interested in telling a compelling and transformative story.

Abraham, Jacob, and even God are not portrayed as perfect beings who can do no wrong, but rather, they are used as characters in a greater narrative who change and improve themselves and learn in order to teach us to do the same. They are not perfect because we are not perfect. How could they teach us anything about how to change our lives if they were perfect, angelic beings?

Jacob's lies and deceit toward his brother only serve to highlight his personal transformation.

he struggles with an unknown "man"--maybe a manifestation of himself, maybe his brother esau, maybe his fear of esau, maybe his guilt over what he did, and then comes out transformed, his name changed from Jacob to Israel, because he has "struggled with god and man"

this is all a set up for the happy ending that occurs with the reunion of jacob and esau.


to teach us that only through facing our demons, the darker parts of ourselves will we ever truly be free and truly develop and connect to god